How Many of us Really Love Jesus?

This blog was inspired by reading one of my daily devotionals last night before bed. The title of it was this: Lovest Thou Me? When I began reading that, it really made me start to think long and hard about the decisions I've made in the past and present, then the question of "How many of us really love Jesus popped into my head. A lot of people say that they love Jesus, but in reality they don't really. If they really loved Him then they wouldn't have gone about their daily lives sinning left and right. I know I should practice what I preach because I'm not perfect, nobody is. All I really want to do is be happy and content with what I have rather than what I don't have. Know what I mean? Without God, I would have never been able to be who I am today rather than the way I was back then. So,thank God for that! Anyway, while I was reading Romans 5: 2-11, I began thinking more about my love that I have for Jesus and I'm questioning myself, Do I really love Him? If I really love Him then I wouldn't have made all of these terrible decisions in the past and present. I'll admit that it's incredibly hard to be a full on follower of Jesus, but like I always say, in the end it is always worth it. We all fall sometimes, but if it wasn't for God and Jesus, then we wouldn't be able to pick ourselves back up and go about our daily lives as strong believers of Christ. When we fall, God picks us back up and holds us in His arms and tells us that it will all be okay and not to worry, because he's taking care of everything, it just takes His perfect timing. So, please be patient and wait upon the Lord.
In verses 2-5 it says this " By whom also we have access by faith into His grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the Glory of God. And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; and patience, experience; and experience, hope: and hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the holy ghost which is given unto us." In other words, faith, hope,and love are at the heart of your christian life. Our relationship with God begins with faith, which can help us realize that we are delivered from our past by Christ's death. Hope grows as we learn all that God has in mind for us; it gives us the promise of the future. And God's love fills our lives and gives us the ability to reach out to others and pull them in closer toward the Lord, because whether they know it or not, they desperately need the Lord. This whole entire world needs the Lord, this world is like a living hell. None of us want to be here any longer, this world is just a big, sad mess and it needs major help from the Lord. None of us even belong down here on this world, we belong in God's world which is probably full of love and happiness and ya know what? I can't wait until I get to go there sometime soon. God is not finished with me yet down here on earth, He put me here to try and help out others by pulling them in closer to the Lord and I've been trying, and let me tell ya, it isn't an easy task at all. It's a major pain in the butt, but I do it anyway because that is what the Lord wants me to do with my time down here on earth.
In verses 3-4 it says that for first century christians, suffering was the rule rather than the exception. Paul tells us that in the future we will become, but until then we must overcome. To overcome means that all of these experiences that we're going through may be difficult but it's the difficulties that help us grow. "Glory in tribulations" means to rejoice in suffering. We rejoice in suffering, not because we like pain or deny it's tragedy, but because we know God is using your life's difficulties and Satan's attacks to build your character. The problems that we face will develop into our patience- which in turn will strengthen our character, deepen our trust in God, and give us greater confidence about the future. You probably find your patience being tested in some way every single day of your lives. You should be thanking God for those opportunities to grow, and deal with in his strength. None of us know what the future holds, but when we get to the future it will be the best thing that has ever happened to us' and I am very excited to see what the future holds not only for myself, but for my family,friends,job situations,our church, etc. It's actually really cool to think about. So for your own good please stop dwelling about your past and help God and yourself with your future. The future is yours, so lets make it happen! I am ready, are you?
In verses 5-6, it's saying this: " and hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the holy ghost which is given unto us. For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for us the ungodly." In other words it's saying that All three members of the Trinity are involved in salvation. The Father loved us so much that he sent His son to bridge the Gap between us. The Father and the Son send the Holy Spirit to fill our lives with love and to enable us to live by His power. With all this loving care, how can we do less than serve Him completely! We were helpless because we could do nothing on our own to save our lives. So,someone had to come and put a complete stop to it. Christ came at exactly the right time in history-according to God's own schedule. God controls all of history, and he controlled the timing, method,and events that surrounded Jesus' death. God's timing is always perfect, so we need to be patient, even though a lot of the time none of us have patience to deal with anything. I've had my fair share of dealing with rude people,and quite frankly, I'm sick of dealing with rude people, they just completely ruin my day. There are some days when I just want to scream and set certain people straight, but I don't because I know that God is taking care of them and their own lives. So, God is telling me to stop looking at other people's lives and start looking at my own, and do something about it. I go out on a limb to help people out, but I barely receive anything in return, so I wonder why I even bother with things like that. It's clearly pointless and I shouldn't ever expect anything in return,even though I do a lot of the time, but I shouldn't. I just need to stop with it and start focusing on my God,my family, and myself. It's just not worth it for me to keep dealing with other people's crap. Enough is enough! Time to move on! I am done!
In verses 8-11 it's saying this: " But God commendeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him. For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. And not only so, but we also joy in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom we have now received the atonement." In different words it's telling us that God sent Jesus Christ to die for us, not because we were good enough, but because He loved us so incredibly much. Whenever you feel uncertain about God's love for you, remember that He loved you way before you even turned to Him. The love that caused Christ to die is the same love that sends the Holy Spirit to live in us and guide us every single day. The power that raised Christ from the dead is the same power that saved you and is available to you in your daily life. Be assured that, having begun a life with Christ, you have a reserve of power and love to call on each day for help to meet every challenge or trial that you might have to face. You can pray for God's strength and love as you need it. God is holy, and He will not be associated with sin. All people are sinful, and all sin deserves punishment. But instead of punishing us with the death that we deserve, however, Christ took our sins upon himself and paid the price for them with His own death. Now we can "joy in God." Through faith in His work, we become His friends rather than being His enemies and outcasts.
A lot of the time I question God's love for me, even though I really shouldn't. But every time I'm questioning God's love, I always end up praying and talking to Him about my feelings for all the crap that I've done and how He always makes me feel better and comforted by just being in His presence and becoming good friends with Him. He's my heavenly father and he's like my best friend. I just wish that more people would come to Christ and be good friends with Him just like I am and several others are. The sooner the people do that, the better off they'll all be. It's definitely worth it, so just take that first step and do it! The first step is always the hardest, but the sooner that you take that first step, the much happier this world will be. Don't be afraid, just do it, he's ready and waiting. I want you all to know that no matter how big your problems are, God can handle it. He's working in you all as we speak. Stop living in the darkness and come into the beautiful light of the Lord, you'll be glad that you did. To conclude this blog entry, I just want to say a quick prayer to God, will you all please join me? "Dear God, thank you for all that you've done and will continue to do, please bring peace,serenity,joy,love, and happiness into the people's lives that need it most, help them to rejoice in you and turn away from their old ways,and let them be content with what they have and not wanting more. They should want more of you, God, not more of anything else. Please help them to rid them of their selves and help them to do good and be good,please be with those who don't know you yet and pull them in closer to you, so that they can have this amazing relationship with you, like I do and my church does. Thank you,Lord, I love you, Amen." Well goodnight and May God bless you all.

Doing Good

While I was reading 1 Peter 4: 3-6, it inspired me to write this blog entry. So, here goes. Verse 3 is saying that for the time past of our life may suffice us to have wrought the will of the Gentiles, when we chose to walk in lasciviousness, lusts, excess of wine, revellings, banquetings, and abominable idolatries: wherein they think it strange that ye run not with them to the same excess of riot, speaking evil of you: who shall give account to him that is ready to judge the quick and the dead. In verse 4 it's basically saying that people whose lives change radically at conversion might experience contempt from their old friends. They might be scorned not only because they refuse to participate in certain activities but also because their priorities have changed and they are now headed into the exact opposite direction. Their lives incriminate their friends' sinful activities. Mature christians should be trying to help new believers resist such pressures of opposition by helping them to be faithful to Christ, surrounding them as new friends, and encouraging them to develop all new habits and kick all old habits and help them to find activities that are not only enjoyable but positive for their new found spiritual growth. Now, I completely agree with what I just wrote previously because I'm not the type to go out and party and such. I've always been a homebody and I prefer it that way. I have found so many new things to do, that I'm incredibly excited about and it's helping me to stay in God's word. For example, I'm using my talent for writing to try and reach out to the unsaved. Those of you who are not saved, there's still time. It is not too late. Come on, what are you waiting for? Stop holding yourself back and stop letting other people and things hold you back as well. We have to learn how to be bold in Christ. The sooner that we learn that, the better off that you'll all be, trust me. As soon as you do so, you'll be saying to yourself, "why the heck did I wait so long?" "This is awesome!" "God is awesome!" The way I see it, there's just one God and one God only. Why do you like to go out and party and drink? It's not my idea of fun. You'll go home that night, pass out in bed, and then wake up in the morning and not remember anything that happened last night. Now, I don't know about you all, but I'd much rather wake up the next morning remembering everything that had happened the night before. That's how really good memories are made and you will treasure them forever, just like you should treasure God forever. I know from my own personal experience. I'd rather be who I really am than be something I'm totally not. It's all about being true to yourself and true to God also. Stop lying to yourself, and have some respect. Jesus loves you and he wants you to have a really close relationship with him. So, stop waiting, and just go for it! Anyway, sorry to get off subject here, lets go back to the bible verse. Ok so, Verse 5 says this: "Who shall give account to him that is ready to judge the quick and the dead. Verse 6 says this: " For this cause was the gospel preached also to those that are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit. In other words, verse 5 is trying to say this: The basis of salvation is whether we have believed in Jesus, but the basis for judgement is how we have lived our lives according to Jesus and his teachings. All people will be judged: believers for the rewards they will receive; unbelievers for punishment. Those who inflict persecution are marked for punishment when they stand before God, so we must be completely ready. This might give you a new perspective on your activities and actions today. Are you prepared to explain them to God? I think I am. In other words verse 6 is saying that, many people who were in the early church had several concerns about life after death. In Thessalonica, Christians worried that loved ones who died before Christ's return might never be able to see Christ. Peter's readers needed to be reminded that the dead ( both the faithful and their opressors) would be judged. The judgement will be perfectly fair, he points out, because even the dead have heard the Gospel. The Good News was first announced when Jesus Christ preached on the earth, but it has been operating since before the creation of the world, and it affects all mankind, the dead as well as the living. I guess the point that I'm trying to make here is that no matter how badly your suffering, you must remain fully committed to God with all of your heart. He will never let you down, He's always there when you need Him, but first, you must call on Him, and He will fully take care of the rest. I already did, and I've never felt better, God is amazing and so are you, and let nobody tell you differently. You are who you are, and if people don't like it, then screw them, they're not worth your time and they're not worth crying over. When something doesn't exactly work out the way you were hoping it would be, don't whine about it, be happy about it because it's really a blessing in disguise, and because God has other plans for you, no matter how big or small they might be. We all must praise the Lord no matter what we're going through. To conclude this blog entry, I just want to tell you all that no matter what your going through and how hard it is, keep your chin up, keep smiling,stay strong,stand firm, and be persistent with God. Don't worry, be happy, you will get through this. May God Bless you all and goodnight.

My Sermon

What’s The Next Step?

John 6; 28-40

Good morning everyone,

I was just reading John 6; 28-40 and it really made me think about what our next step is as a congregation. Verses 28 and 29 are talking about how many sincere seekers there are for God, and that are puzzled about what he wants all of them to do, and sadly all the other religions of this world are certain people’s attempts to answer this question: “What is the next step?” “Where do we go from here?” Jesus’ reply is very brief and simple: We must believe in the person that God has sent to us whether it is a boy or girl because Jesus was the one whom God sent to us to know his truth and what he’s talking about. We are trying to pull people in closer to Jesus, not scare them away. We want as many people saved as possible, because hell is very hot and I’m pretty sure that nobody wants to go there. It’s awful. I know that I wouldn’t want to go there; I’d rather be with Jesus and not Satan. I prefer to live my life the way that God wants me to live it, no matter how difficult any of the tasks are. I will do what his will is for me. I am not scared, because I know that Jesus is always with me whether it is day or night. He’s the one who raises me up, when I am down. He is my shoulder to cry on. Because of the Lord, I am strong and can do anything with God on my side. He’s the one that’s fighting the war for us. In addition to this, satisfying God does not come from the work that we do, but from whom we believe in. The first step involves accepting that Jesus is exactly who he says he is. All of our spiritual development is built on this very affirmation. We all must declare in a prayer to Jesus, “You are the Christ, the son of the living God,” and embark on a life of belief that is satisfying to your Creator!

Verse 35 is saying that the people eat the bread to satisfy their physical hunger and to sustain their physical life. We can satisfy our spiritual hunger and sustain spiritual life only by the right relationship with Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. It’s no wonder he calls himself the bread of life. But the bread must be eaten to give life, and Christ must be invited into our daily walk in order to give us our spiritual life. I don’t know about you all, but I am very glad that I’ve let Jesus into my life. To me it seems easier when we have the Lord in our lives. He’s the one who makes our lives breathable every single day, no matter how difficult the day turns out to be. I’ve had my fair share of very trying days, as I’m sure you all have experienced those days as well. Nobody ever said that following Jesus would be easy. Nothing worthwhile is ever easy, trust me, I know from experience. When we make mistakes we just need to make sure that we learn from them and try not to do it again. As a matter of fact, we should stay far away from that, it just leads us to much more trouble than we need to be in. God wants us to stay on the path to righteousness, so that we don’t suffer for all eternity. Verses 37 and 38 are saying that Jesus did not work independently of God; instead he works in union with God. This gives us even more reason to be assured that we are more than welcome to be invited into his holy presence and to be protected by him and only him always, for the rest of our lives. Jesus’ purpose was to do the will of God, and not to satisfy our own human desires. When we follow Jesus and only Jesus, we should have the same exact purpose for being down here on earth. Jesus was the one who put us all here in the first place and that reason is to fulfill his purposes only. We do not belong to this place; we belong to Jesus and only Jesus. We are heirs to his kingdom in heaven, but first we need to have our lives centered on Jesus and only Jesus. We need to resist all of our temptations as humans and do what is pleasing to Jesus, even though it may be difficult at times, but when it’s done with, it will be more than worth it, believe me, I’ve gone through a lot to get where I am today in my walk with Jesus. Jesus has completely changed my life forever. It is amazing to me how Jesus can change someone or something so much in a matter of days, hours, months, and even years. Our God is an Awesome God! He’s always working behind the scenes in each of our lives, even though some of us don’t see it yet, but you will, it just takes time, everything takes time. It is not on our time, but on Jesus’ time for things to begin to unravel for the future. You just need to have faith and to have full trust in God; after you do that, God will take care of the rest. Remember: “He is for us and not against us.” “With God on our side, nothing is impossible.” “If God is for us, then who can be against us?”

Verse 39 is telling us that Jesus said he would not lose even one person that the father has given to him. We are his sheep and he is our shepherd. We must always stay near him and never drift away from him. For anyone who makes a sincere commitment to believe in Jesus Christ as our Lord and savior will be secure in all of God’s promises for our eternal lives that will hopefully be spent with him in heaven where we’re all supposed to belong, but sadly some of us don’t belong there, we belong elsewhere and it isn’t pleasant, trust me. I feel like throughout my life I’ve been there, and sometimes I still feel like I’m there. However, these are only minor stepping stones to get where you’d actually rather be. Our life down here is only temporary, and although a lot of the time we feel as if it’s permanent, it’s not, believes me. Also a lot of the time I feel like the world is against me, even though it’s not. It feels as if the weight of the whole world is on your shoulders, but it’s not. The truth is, the entire weight of the world is on God’s shoulders, not ours. That is why we have to keep putting the weight back on his shoulders, because we tend to want to take the weight of the world on ourselves and we can’t handle it. But please don’t fret because God is already working on making this world a better place to be in. He’s working on it as we speak. So stop worrying, and know that God has already taken care of it. Anyway, Christ will not let his people be overcome by Satan and let them lose all of their salvation. Verse 40 says that those who put all of their faith in Jesus will be resurrected from physical death to your eternal life with God when Christ comes again and it will be soon. So, we all have to be ready and prepared for his arrival. He will come like a thief in the night, so be aware of all your surroundings. He can come at any moment of any day. Now is the time for us to put all of our differences aside and work together as a church family pulling more and more people in closer to God. They need to know that Jesus loves them and doesn’t want them to suffer any more than they already are. It is not too late to come to know God. “Come to me all you who are weary.” He’s ready and waiting, so come on don’t let anything or anyone stop you. You can do it. “I can do all things through he who strengthens me.” “We all must walk by faith, and not by sight.” In conclusion, I believe, with my whole heart, that everyone can believe in God and Jesus, if they choose to let Him into their hearts, minds, bodies, and souls. I see the proof of our work in every new person that joins our congregation with an open mind and an open heart. Jesus can and will perform miracles every day, and I believe that if we believe in him wholeheartedly, that our congregation will grow by leaps and bounds, and with that our vision to spread the word of Jesus far and wide will be realized. May God bless you all, and Have a good day. Amen!

Heart Break and Worry

I was just reading Deuteronomy 10: 16-19 and I think it made a whole lot of sense to me about how we should obey God and do what he wants us to do with our lives. In verse 16 it says to circumcise therefore the foreskin of your heart, and be no more stiffnecked. In other words this means that God had required all male Israelites to be circumcised, but he wants them to go far beyond performing the surgery to actually understand its entire meaning. They needed to submit to God inside, in their hearts, as well as outside, in their bodies. Then they could really begin to imitate God's love and justice in all of their relationships with other people. If our hearts, are right with God, then our relationships with other people can be made right, too. When your heart has been cleansed and you have been reconciled to God, you will begin to see a difference in the way you treat others. I fully agree with what I just wrote. It's impossible to have a good relationship with others if both your hearts are not reconciled to God. If your not right with God, then nothing else will be right with God. It will be a long and difficult path without being reconciled to God. That long and difficult path will lead you to absolutely nowhere other than hell. So, my point is that without God, nothing will be right with yourself or anyone else around you. You need to learn how to treat others the way that God wants you to treat them. With God,I find my true happiness, because without him,I'd be totally and completely lost. He is my strength to get through each day without crying, without pain, without any heartbreak, and with resisting all of my temptations. Verse 17 says this: " For the Lord your God is God of Gods, and Lord of Lords, a great God, a mighty, and a terrible, which regardeth not persons, nor taketh reward. In other words this means that in saying that the Lord is God of gods and Lord of lords, Moses was distinguishing the true God from all the local gods worshiped throughout the land. Then Moses went a step further, calling God "terrible." God is "terrible" in that he has such awesome power and justice that people cannot stand before him without his mercy. Fortunately, his mercy toward his people is unlimited. When we begin to grasp the extent of God's mercy toward us, we see what true love really is and how deeply God loves us. Although our sins deserve severe judgement, God has chosen to show love and mercy to all who seek him. I agree with that verse as well, because when I finally seeked God, everything in my life has been going pretty well for me, except for one thing, I haven't found my true love yet. I'm still waiting. So, God if he's out there, send him my way, because I am ready and waiting. Thank you Lord, I love you, Amen. In verse 19 it says this: " Love ye therefore the stranger: for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt." In other words, it means that just as the Israelites' ancestors were at one time strangers in a strange land, so they were to be friends to foreigners who were seeking a new life with them. Likewise, we are commanded to love foreigners. By showing genuine love, we may bring those who are not yet Christians to Christ. We must remember that all of us were brought to Christ through someone else's loving concern. Now that statement is very true especially in my life. I was brought to Christ by another person's reconciled life to Christ. Without him, none of this would have been possible for me to do. So,thank God for him. This certain person still holds a very special place in my heart, and I hope that he knows that and if not then, please God, tell him that. Thank you Lord, I love you, amen. I was also reading Philippians 4: 7-9 and that verse also makes a whole lot of sense to me. In verse 7 it says, "and the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." In other words it means this : "God's peace is different from the world's peace. It is not found in positive thinking, in absence of conflict, or in good feelings. Real peace comes from knowing that because God is in control, our citizenship in Christ's Kingdom is sure, our destiny is set, and our victory over sin is certain. Do you want to worry less? I sure do. So, all you have to do is pray a lot more! and worry a lot less! Whenever you begin to worry, just stop and pray. God will take care of the rest, trust me, he will. "Time heals all wounds." Verse 8 says, " Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. In different words, verse 8 means this: " What we put into our minds determines what comes out in our words and actions. Paul tells us to program our minds with thoughts that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report,virtuous, and praiseworthy. Do you have problems with impure thoughts and daydreams? Examine what you are putting into your mind through television, the internet, books, movies, and magazines. Replace the harmful input with wholesome material. Above all, read God's word and pray. Ask him to help you focus your mind on what is good and pure. It takes practice, but it can be done. I strongly agree with that as well. Lately, my mind has been on other not so good things and I feel like I just destroyed everything I've ever worked for in these past 2 years. It's just that I was doing so well,and I fell. Now, it's time to pick myself back up and put all of my focus back on the Lord. Verse 9 says this, " Those things which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you." So, in conclusion to this, I just want to say that putting your focus back on God will not be easy, but with a lot of hard work, it will more than pay off in the end. I know this because I've fallen may times before, but God always somehow picks me back up and sets me on the right path to the future with him. Keep on smiling because you never know whose going to be falling in love with your smile. Thank you and May God Bless you all abundantly.

Why Does Life and Love Have to be so Complicated?

How many of you have ever asked yourself, will this ever end? That's a question that I've been thinking about for a while now and so far, no answer. I feel like God will never give us a break. It's like things have gone from bad to worse. In Job 3:23-26, it says this " Why is light given to a man whose way is hid, and whom God hath hedged in? For my sighing cometh before I eat, and my roarings are poured out like the waters. For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me. I was not in safety, neither had I rest, neither was I quiet; yet trouble came." To me, this bible verse makes a whole of sense to me, and I can sort of relate to how Job was feeling. As you all know, in these past few months, my family and I have been going through a lot of trial and tribulation. Some bigger than others. For example, my dad's back has just gone from bad to worse. He feels like it'll never get better. My mom and I feel as if we're all fighting a war, and that the war will never be over. We all have spent many nights up really late due to all that has been our minds lately. In times such as this, we often find it very difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It feels like it's taking forever to get here, and we're all running very low on faith. It's as if we're lost and stuck in the dark. I just want us all to be able to move forward from this, but it feels like we're stuck here and not going anywhere fast. It's as if everything is crumbling all around us. Our life is not given merely for happiness and personal fulfillment, but for us to serve and honor God with all of our hearts. The worth and meaning of life is not based on what we feel, but on the one reality no one can take away- which is God's love for us. Don't assume that because God truly loves you, he will always prevent you from suffering. God's love cannot be measured or limited by how great or how little we may suffer. Romans 8: 38 and 39 teaches us that nothing can separate us from His love. Romans 8: 38 and 39 say this " For I am persuaded , that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor death, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." I truly believe in this bible verse, but like I said above, sometimes it's really difficult to not let things separate us from God, because of all that I've been through. Some good, some not so good. But the truth is, I always end up coming back to God no matter what I had just been through. In all honesty, I feel like I have gone through hell and back. Sometimes,I still feel like I'm in hell due to all that has happened recently. I think that we've all suffered enough, and I think that the suffering should be over for us permanently. I think that it's time for a whole slew of good things to start happening, like now. Seriously, enough is enough! I've had it! It's just so frustrating ya know? None of us deserve to be going through what we're going through right now, it is seriously a living hell. It's not fun. It's ridiculus and stupid and causing us more pain than we deserve. We've been through enough. Stop the world, I want to get off. May God please help us all, because we desperately need it. I don't know about any of you, but I am so sick and tired of walking around in this world full of pain,angst,stress,heart break, worry, etc. I am so sick of walking around and trying to be happy and act happy, I've just had enough. Something's Gotta Give and soon! It feels like I'm being pulled in two completely different directions. I feel like I need to get away from here for a while. Do any of you have those days where you just want to be alone and not ever bothered? I've been feeling a lot like that lately, it's just crazy and really stupid. Certain people in this world, really suck. I've dealt with some of them everywhere I go. I also hate feeling helpless and useless, like a waste of space. I also hate not being able to drive to go to places that I want to go. It's like i'm stuck and can't go anywhere. It's so aggravating. It's like I want to get up and do something and go somewhere without relying on anybody else to take me. I know this is only temporary, but this really sucks, it needs to end now. I know that I have God, but things are just getting more and more difficult to deal with. I absolutely hate being stuck in the middle of everything. I'm praying to God every night, but does he hear me? Will he answer me? That, I do not know. I'm not sure if I'll ever know about anything anymore. I'm listening for what he's trying to say to me, but I'm not hearing anything. Is he really speaking to me or am I just imagining that he's speaking to me? I don't know, I just don't know anymore. Is He happy with me? Am I doing anything right? Am I pleasing him? I'm getting absolutely no answers at all whatsoever. It's getting to a point where I just want to give up on everything. It's just absolutely ridiculus. I think i'm on the verge of a nervous break down. God, help me please. God, give me the strength to get through all of this and carry on with my life in a happy, healthy way, Lord, help to hear and understand what your saying to me and help me to do what it is that you want me to do, because I don't know what to do anymore, Lord, Help me, please help me. Please help me to be strong and remain positive, and help us all to see the light at the end of the tunnel, help us all to move forward with our lives, help us all to put all of our differences aside and work together as a family, help us to forgive and forget, Help us all to work these things out. Thank you, Lord, I love you, amen! So, in conclusion to this, I'm sorry for venting to you all, but I've just been holding it all in so long, that I just needed to get it all out with hopes that things will slowly start to get better not just for me, but for my family also. Thank you, and God Bless.

~Emily j. Pica

Where To Go From Here.

How many times have you asked yourself what your true purpose for this world is? I find myself asking that question to myself over and over again. I don't know where to start. As I was reading Leviticus 26; 40-45, I began thinking about the above question again. I'm constantly asking God "What is my true purpose for this world?" "Where Do I go Next?" "Who am I supposed to spend the rest of my life with?" "Where will I find him?" Where will he find me?" Those are answers I really don't know, but wish I knew them. I look around at past relationships and already some of the people in those relationships have already moved on with their lives in a happy, healthy way. "What's wrong with me?" "How come I'm not there yet?" "Why is this taking so long?" For example, there's this one person whose been dating his girlfriend for a year now and they're happy. The next step is most likely engagement. I wish I was there already, but sadly, I am not. I have been waiting 8 long years for the right person to come along, but he's not here yet. I'm still waiting. Anyway, lets get back to the bible verse. In verse 40 it's basically saying to confess their iniquity, and their father's iniquity, with their trespasses for which they have trespassed against God and others, and make sure that we are walking alongside Jesus. But the truth is walking the path of Jesus is a very difficult one. It has been especially difficult for me as well as others that I know. A true christian life is never easy, but nobody said it was going to be easy anyway. No matter where we go or what we do, it will always be difficult, that is until the day Jesus comes back, and our eternal life with him. But first we have to go through judgement and then our eternal life will be decided. In verse 41, it's saying that we must accept our punishment of iniquity and be humbled before God and Jesus. We have a very merciful God and he will give us our expected end. Hopefully the expected end will be a good one. In verse 42, it says that we must remember our covenant just like Jesus did with Jacob, Isaac, and Abraham. In other words, Jesus is saying that he will always remember his covenant with the 3 people I mentioned above. In verse 43, it's saying even though certain people despise God's judgements, and their souls are abhorred to God's statutes, they must accept their punishment for whatever it may be, gracefully, because it's their own fault in the first place for them to receive such punishment. After they do that, then they'll either be sent down to Hell or sent up to Heaven with God and Jesus. In verse 44, it's saying that when these certain people be in the land of their enemies, God will not cast them away, and neither will he abhorr them, destroy them utterly, or to break his covenant with them: For he is the Lord their God. In verse 45, it says " But I will for their sakes remember the covenant of their ancestors, whom I brought forth out of the land of Egypt in the sight of the heathen, that I might be their God: I am the Lord." In verse 46, it's saying this: " These are the statutes and judgements and laws, which the Lord made between him and the children of Israel in Mount Sinai by the hand of Moses." In total, all of these verses are showing us what God meant when he said that he is longsuffering. Even if the Israelites chose to disobey God and were scattered among the heathen, God will still give them the opportunity to repent and return to him. His purpose is not to destroy them, but to help them grow. Our day-to-day experiences and hardships are sometimes overwhelming; unless we can see that God's purpose is to bring about continual growth in us, we may despair. The hope that we need is well expressed in Jeremiah 29: 11,12. "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall you call upon me, and you shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you." To retain hope while we suffer shows that we understand God's merciful ways of relating to all of his people. Anyway, I'd like to conclude this blog with a prayer " Dear Lord, please help us to not have anxieties about all of our futures, because we know that our future is lying in your hands, and it will be the best outcome for all of us. Help us all to be still and know that you are Lord and no matter what happens or where we go, help us to know that you are still here and are listening, Help us to do the works that you have for us to do and not be afraid because we know that you are responsible for anything that happens whether it be good or bad. Thank you, Lord. We Love you, Amen!"

100 Things...

1.) God because he rebaptised me through his holy spirit and for his unconditional love.

2.) Jesus because he's my rock and salvation.

3.) My sister because she's been with me throughout everything (including all of my very bad decisions).

4.) My parents because of all that they do for me.

5.) Jacqui because she's the greatest best friend anybody could possibly ask for, even though we barely see each other. But I miss her dearly and hope to see her again really soon. She's been with me through all the good times and bad and would do anything for me no matter the day or time.

6.) For Ted because he can fix anything and everything.

7.)Matt because he's helping me through all this and for being such a good friend to me in such a small amount of time.

8.) For Mike because he brought me closer to Jesus.

9.) Oden

10.) My church because of all they're love and support for both my family and I in this very difficult time of our lives.

11.) My Pastor for everything.

12.) My sweet, perfect, little nephew, Eliot Theodore Baker for bring such love and happiness into my otherwise boring life.

13.) For Melissa for all her prayers and for her strength.

14.) Nature Photography.

15.) My Camera.

16.) Texting.

17.) e-mails.

18.) my computer.

19.) My job.

20.) My car (even though I don't drive it that much).

21.) Good christian music.

22.) Facebook for staying in touch with all of my friends both old and new.

23.) My cell phone.

24.) For my aunt Janine.

25.) For nana and papa.

26.) For grandma and grandpa.

27.) For Aunt Fran.

28.) Paper and pens.

29.) vacations.

30.) Massages.

31.) For prayer.

32.) My Bible.

33.) For washers and dryers that work.

34.) My glasses.

35.) Holidays (Christmas especially).

36.) Birthdays.

37.) Any and all board games.

38.) Clothing.

39.) Shoes.

40.) A bed to sleep in.

41.) A roof over my head.

42.) Health insurance.

43.) All doctors, nurses, etc. (Dentists, therapists).

44.) Scrapbooking.

45.) Many many good memories.

46.) My class of 2006 blanket because it's proof that I attended high school.

47.) Skype.

48.) Internet.

49.) Online classes.

50.) A good hair cut from a good stylist.

51.) New beginnings.

52.) Romance movies.

53.) Nicely fitting undergarments.

54.) Hot chocolate (so good).

55.) Iced Coffee from Dunkin Donuts.

56.) All of our troops fighting for our freedom.

57.) Advil, Albuterol. (Any and all meds.).

58.) Poems.

59.) Ramen noodles (aka. oodles of noodles).

60.) Sandwiches.

61.) Diet pepsi and cream soda.

62.) Chocolate (love it!)

63.) Christmas movies.

64.) Lots of laughs.

65.) True love.

66.) Happiness.

67.) Peace.

68.) Joy.

69.) Marriage proposals.

70) lgmh.com

71.) Weddings.

72.) For the colors, pink and purple.

73.) Singing.

74.) Dancing.

75.) Miracles.

76.) Blessings.

77.) Warm weather.

78.) Sunsets.

79.) Sunrises.

80.) All animals.

81.) Warm slippers.

82.) The English language.

83.) Jewelry that has sentimental values included.

84.) Beautiful flowers.

85.) For the bus.

86.) Acts of random kindness.

87.) Independence.

88.) For summer strolls.

89.) For beaches.

90.) For the strength to carry on.

91.) Forgiveness.

92.) For life's winding roads ( which is always a challenge, but well worth it in the end).

93.) For good manicurists.

94.) For honesty.

95.) For loyalty.

96.) For faithfulness.

97.) For religion.

98.) For good manners and respect.

99.) For being able to swim without fear.

100.) For fellow christians.

101.) For alarm clocks because I always need them.

102.) For praise reports.

103.) For magazines.

104.) Having the ability to read and understand certain things.

105.) For my sister once again for challenging me to think about all these things that I am forever thankful and greatful for. God Bless all! AMEN! Now it's your turn to think about this.